Here Comes the BOOM!! (aka reality)

So first of all, October 4th marks 100 days until I begin my trip and realizing I am about to be down to double digits both excites and scares the mess out of me. A couple weeks ago, I just went through a phase where I had a really hard time accepting the upcoming reality and thinking about all the stuff I need to do almost made me depressed. My mom and I had taken a weekend trip to Destin and I had tried on Chacos which I think are like THE ugliest shoes in the world and because I had let myself start to get stressed about it, just trying them on almost made me cry. I bought some a couple days later because I'd rather get it out of the way. Like rippin off a band-aid. If you don't know what Chacos look like I will show you:

.... Now you see my pain

But just like He always does, God has proved Himself to be so faithful. He has been showing me over and over again how He is going to provide for me. I'm not scared anymore. A little nervous but I think anybody would be. I know God is going to take care of me and give me all of the resources and courage I need to be prepared for this trip, even getting over my fear of ugly shoes. Hopefully within the next few weeks I will be finding out about the team I am going with and being Facebook buddies with them which I'm so pumped about! Thank you for all of your continued prayers and support.

PS thank you to my roommate Rachele for finding a quarter on the ground and donating it to my trip. She's really just the sweetest :)

This Is Not Meant to Be a Guilt Trip! Even if it Sounds like It

So the other night I had another night where I stayed up really late thinking about everything that could go wrong or go right with this trip. At the moment the biggest concern is the fact I have like $6,000 I need to go on this trip and I don't know where it's going to come from. I am working many, many hours at chick-fil-a and really trying to cut back on urges to buy really cute clothes but still it all seems very scary. Like real scary! But I have to trust and believe that God is really in control of everything. Even $6,000 of money that I don't have.

And now, here is my deep, spiritual thought of the day: in bible study we were talking about Hebrews 1 focusing on the idea of who Jesus is in our lives. The Bible tells us He is God's Son and ruler and glorious and all of these wonderful things but who is He to us? Which makes you begin to think about, where would I be without Him in my life? I know one thing is for certain, I would not be leaving the country for 6 months with a group of people I've never met to go to places I've never been and serve more people I've never met. I mean that whole thing seems ridiculous! But that's exactly what I am doing. Because Jesus is a part of my life. In my life, Jesus is also the confidence boost I need to do something insane! And I love it!!

Today (September 5th) marks 129 days away from me leaving!